The most important thing to do during the winter months is keep warm, right?  Wrong.

Who cares if your nose is red, your feet are frozen and your skin is whiter than Shannon Noll’s music collection? FASHION STILL EXISTS!

Here are a few of the perils of getting dresses when it's cold.

Hat Hair
The number one enemy of big haired people. It matters not that you spent $150 on your ‘do’, and the hour you took to straighten it in the bathroom this morning was a complete waste of time. Once that beanie hits scalp, you’re hairdresser will be sobbing into his defuzer and refusing to talk to you ever again.
Chunky Clothes
After all the effort you put into losing weight over summer, you’re now walking around in an oversized woolen coat, giving the impression you’re built like Shrek.  Why not talk with a Scottish accent and befriend a donkey to complete the picture?
Dodgy Turtlenecks
OK, maybe some people like to look like a badly dressed giraffe, but it aint gonna get you on the cover of Vogue, honey. A scarf will do exactly the same job, without making it seem like your head is too far away from your body.
Mega Boots
I understand your feet are chilly, but do the boots you are wearing need to reach all the way up to your buns? Loose footwear also attracts rainwater don’t forget.
Red Nose
Fine if you’re raising money for charity, unflattering if you’re leaning in for a pash. Eat well and avoid snotty children or you’ll look like Rudolph the Red Nosed Yes Dear in heels.
Under Done
Although this list suggests a ‘less is more’ approach to winter fashion, don’t go overboard. A skimpy dress and no jacket won’t look good if your shoulders are purple and your teeth are chattering. Cover yourself up, naked season doesn’t start til November.
Pale skin
The pasty-faced albino look is always a hit during winter, particularly on British people and heroin addicts (they look much the same). But a dab of make-up and some smart colour choices will help you look like you’re among the living.
Tanned skin
During winter, the only colour worse than white is orange. People know when you’ve acquired yourself a fake summer hue, usually because you’re glowing like a radiation victim from Chernobyl. If that’s your want, that’s fine, but at least pop on a gasmask to complete the ensemble.
Static
It’s easy to look like Yahoo Serious when the air is moist and you’ve just removed your jumper. Interesting as it may be for infants, it won’t get you a promotion or a boyfriend.
Hot Chips and red wine
Sure fatty food and drink will comfort you, but when your costume comes off at the start of summer, you’ll be twice the person you were before. Open your eyes in the shower and remember what it’s like to hit the beach with a bloated rear and bingo wings.