The Scene fired 26 leftfield questions to Melbourne’s most affable electronic heavyweight, while he DJ'ed and drank beer.

What’s the capital of Peru? 
P?
How many inches in a centimeter?
Er….12? No, wait, divide by 2 1/2…I dunno, about 0.3 or something.
Beatles or Stones?
Definitely Stones.
Gimme a good You Tube site…
Luke McD live in Belgium is number 1. He’s the man you know.
What’s your best recipe for eggs?
Scrambled, obviously.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because dinosaurs were not invented yet.
What do you think Lost is actually about?
I don’t care.
Did you ever want to live in a house with your band mates like the Monkees?
Tried it but everyone ends up loving each other just a bit too much.
Who did all the housework?
The drummer, that’s what they’re for.
Who’s the best dancer in your band?
It’s a one man band these days but unfortunately it’s still not me.
What’s your favourite prime number?
13. It rocks.
How old were you when you first threw up backstage?
I’ve never spewed backstage but I did spew ON stage when I was 21. I’m planning to spew backstage soon.
Do you like to bite the hand that feeds you?
Oh yes, it makes for the best lunch.
What do you read to cheer yourself up?
Sound on Sound magazine and the notes on the back of my hand.
What do the voices in your head sound like?
Luke McD.
Death before disco?
Without a doubt. Death is definitely more appealing. It has a longer shelf life too.
Who in the food chain do you feel most sorry for?
My partner in crime, Evan.
What is 6x7?
Level 42.
Do tippers really make better lovers?
Yes, because otherwise you get tipping anxiety which will ruin the meal, if you know what I mean.
I want to lose weight now, can you tell me how?
Stick around, I’ll hook you up.
The phrase ‘there’s nothing worse’ gets used a lot. When is it appropriate?
When there is absolutely nothing worse.
Which is the largest ocean?
Atlantic? Arctic? No, Indian. Is it Indian?
I don’t know.
You really should know the answers to your own questions.
I’ll look it up. Next…..In the 80s Gary Newman sang ‘are friend electric?’ Well?
They can be, but I like the acoustic ones.
Is it possible to be both foxy and inexpensive?
Oh, I hope so. This whole ‘money equals foxy’ thing gets me down. Foxy and frugal is where I’m at.
Did you go to any good parties in 1999?
No. 1998 was much better. Prince is an idiot.
What does purple taste like?
I don’t know, I’m colour blind. Purple is my problem hue.

Ehsan Gelsi plays with the Smash Bang Records crew every Friday night at Lounge. Listen to tracks here